Inama n’Uburyo wakwitwara wowe mugore udafitanyeumubano mwiza nyirabukwe

Nubwo hari aho usanga umubano hagati y’umukazana na nyirabukwe ari nta makemwa bafite byinshi bahuza, ahenshi usanga atari uko bimeze, ugasanga ahubwo bahora bahanganye. Ugasanga byarageze no kuri rwa rwego biba bitagishoboka ko bakwiyunga.

Umubano mubi hagati y’umukazana na nyirabukwe akenshi uturuka ku mubano mwiza ababyeyi b’abagore bakunze kugirana n’abahungu babo, iyo hinjiyemo undi mugore rero abo babyeyi babifata nk’aho aje kubiba umuhungu wabo. Ikiyongera ku gufuha rero ni uguhangayika, bibaza niba uwo mukobwa azabasha gushimisha umuhungu wabo cyangwa se nanone niba atazamuhemukira. Ibi bigatuma bamwigaho guhera ku kuntu asa,imiterere ye, ukuntu yitwara cyangwa se nanone aho aturuka uko hazwi. Icyo ugomba kwibuka niba nyokobukwe ari uko ameze, nuko atari wowe kibazo, kuko niyo umuhungu we ashaka undi mukobwa nawe ari uko yari kumugenza. Nubwo akenshi azajya akubwira uko umukobwa yashakaga ko umuhungu we azarongora ameze, akakubwira ko mubyo yifuzaga nta na kimwe ufite ntuzabyiteho. Ababyeyi nkabo akenshi ntibaba bazi neza icyo bashaka, avuga ibyo yiboneye kugira ngo abashe kugaragara ko nawe ahari. Ugomba guca bugufi rero, ugatera intambwe ya mbere yo kumwegera kugira ngo nawe umufungure amaso ace bugufi, bityo abahe urubuga rwo kubaka urugo rwanyu.

Ashobora kuzakugerageza ukageza aho wumva bigiye kukurenga, ariko ntibizaguhungabanye ngo ucike intege, cyangwa ngo wumve ko ibyo avuga aribyo koko. Birumvikana ko bishobora kuba byakurenga ukaba washaka guhangana nawe, ariko ibi ntacyo byagufasha, ahubwo bizatuma umubano wanyu urushaho kuba mubi bitume urushaho guhangayika. Ikindi kandi ni uko nuhitamo guhangana, uwo mwashakanye nawe uzamushyira mu bibazo kuko azaba agomba guhitamo uruhande abogamiraho. Biraruta rero kwihanganira ijambo rimwe ribi cyangwa abiri, aho kugira ngo winjire mu ntambara na nyokobukwe. Mwegere muganire wirinda kumuhangara kuko ikigamijwe atari uguhangana, ahubwo ni ugushaka uko mwumvikana. Ntibizakubuze kuba wamusura utajyanye n’umugabo wawe, umufashe uturimo two mu rugo nawe abone ko ufite ubushake bwo kumwegera.

Ikindi kintu abantu bibagirwa ni uko akenshi ajya kwinjira mu buzima kuko mwamuhaye akanya, birumvikana ko aba akeneye kureba umwana we n’abuzukuru ariko nanone si ngombwa buri munsi cyangwa kenshi mu cyumweru. Aha biba byiza iyo mudaturanye kuko bituma abageraho gake gashoboka, ubundi mukabona uko mwiyubaka ntawe ubavangiye. Ibi ariko biragorana iyo mufite abana, kuko nyirakuru baba bumva ari umuntu udasanzwe mu buzima bwabo, nawe akumva abuzukuru ari abantu bakomeye mu buzima bwe. Iyo bimeze gutyo rero ugerageza kuburyo umubano ukomeza kuba akazuyazi; ntukonje cyane ngo baburane, ntunashyuhe cyane ngo bahorane.

Kuba nyokobukwe yakwivanga mu buzima bw’urugo rwawe rero bishobora guteza ibibazo byinshi muri urwo rugo. Ashobora gutuma uhora uhangayitse ndetse ukaniyanga. Ariko ntuzacike intege, imbere muri uwo muntu ubona akwanga harimo umubyeyi ushaka ko nawe yakomeza kugaragara no gukundwa. Muhagarare imbere wemye, kuko nyuma y’igihe nukomeza kwihangana azashobora kumva umwanya we, icya ngombwa nuko umuha ayo mahirwe!

Yanditswe na Sarongo Richard/Muhabura.rw