Amagambo ababaza abakobwa iyo bayabwiwe n’abakunzi babo ibihe byose

Kuba mu munyenga w’urukundo si ikintu cyo gukinisha nk’uko abenshi babitekereza kuko bisaba kwitwararika no kwitonda ukamenya uko utwara uwo wihebeye, amagambo umubwira, kuko iyo bidakozwe bishobora gushyira mu manga umubano wa bombi.

Mu rukundo ntihakwiye kuzamo amakimbirane kuko akenshi usanga hari abo atandukanya, ibi bijyana rimwe na rimwe no gusanga hari amagambo yatije umurindi isenyuka ry’umubano mwari mufitanye.

Uba ugomba kumenya icyo gukora n’icyo utagomba gukora cyane ukirinda mu byo ubwira uwo mukundana kuko akenshi aribyo usanga byabasenyeye. Burya abagore ni abantu bagira amarangamutima hafi, bashimishwa bakanababazwa n’utundi duto, kugira ngo murambane hari ibyo utagomba kubabwira n’ibyo witwararika.

Inkuru dukesha urubuga Elcrema rwandika inkuru zibanda ku mibanire n’urukundo igaragaza amagambo abakobwa batishimira cyane iyo bayabwiwe n’abo bakundana.

1. Umeze nk’umukobwa twatandukanye

Rimwe na rimwe umusore ashobora kuvuga aya magambo atagambiriye gukomeretsa umukunzi we ariko umukobwa we biramubabaza, aba yumva ari nk’agasuzuguro kumugereranya n’uwo waretse.

Impamvu abakobwa batabikunda ni uko usanga abantu b’igitsinagore bagirirana ishyari, ahita yiyumvisha ko uwo mwatandukanye n’ubundi ukimukunda ukaba urimo kubimwibutsa unabagereranya.

2. Ese uratwite?

Kwiyongera ibiro ku gitsinagore ni ibintu bibaho, igifu kikaguka ndetse no mu nda hakabyibuha. Ntabwo rero kubona umukobwa mukundana yabyibushye bivuga ko atwite ndetse ukaba wanabyuririraho ubimubaza. Ntabwo bishimisha umukobwa na mba kubazwa iki kibazo n’umuntu bakundana, ahita yumva ko utamufitiye icyizere ndetse ko umufata nk’umusambanyi.

3. Umeze nka mama wanjye

Nubwo ushobora kuba ugamije kumushimisha, ntabwo umukobwa yishimira ko umugereranya n’umubyeyi wawe kuko ashobora kuba hari ibyo atamushimyeho akibaza impamvu ubagereranya.

Ubusanzwe umukobwa uba ukwiye kumubwira ibimwerekeyeho wabonesheje amaso yawe aho kumugereranya n’abandi. Iri gereranya benshi mu bakobwa aho bava bakagera ntibabikunda ndetse bishobora gutuma birara.

4. Sinkunda inshuti zawe

Kwerurira umukobwa mukundana ko udakunda inshuti ze bimwereka ko na we utamwishimira kuko burya abantu bagendana hari byinshi baba bahuriyeho.

Abakobwa bakunda urungano rwabo ndetse bakanarubwira ibintu byinshi, iyo umutandukanyije narwo, nawe atangira kukugiraho amakenga ibyanyu bikaba byarangira nabi.

5. Uburyo wasokojemo bushya ntabwo nabukunze

Ubwiza bw’umukobwa bunashingiye ku musatsi we utuma agaragara neza imbere y’amaso y’abantu. Hari igihe utishimira uburyo umukunzi wawe yasokojemo gusa niba utanabikunze, bifate nkaho ari byiza cyane igihe akubajije uko wabibonye.

Wasanga impamvu aba yahinduye imisokoreze ari uko aba agira ngo arusheho kugaragara neza imbere yawe. Tekereza ukuntu yakumva amerewe nuramuka umubwiye ko rwose ibyo yakoze yatakaje umwanya w’ubusa.

6. Ufite imyaka ingahe?

Iki kintu usanga abantu benshi b’abasore aricyo baheraho mu biganiro byabo, nyamara bakirengagiza ko imyaka y’igitsinagore ari ingingo idapfa kwisukirwa na gato kuko ba nyir’ubwite batabikunda.

Uretse we n’umuryango we, naho akorera iyo bibaye ngombwa nibo baba babizi, niba ahisemo kubikubwira nta kibazo ariko si byiza ko umubaza imyaka ye ndetse ugahatiriza.

Abagore bumva ko kubabaza imyaka yabo biba ari nko kurengera ndetse gukomeza gutsimbarara birababaza. Niba umukunda koko hari ubundi buryo uzakoresha imyaka ye ukayimenya wenda we atanabizi ariko utamuhojeje ku nkeke ngo ayikubwire.

7. Nta gahunda yo gushaka mfite

Urukundo rutari urwa kinyeshuri, umukobwa wese arufata nk’urugamije kuzavamo gushinga umuryango. Kumubwira rero ko nta gahunda yo gushaka ufite bisobanuye ko utamwishimiye, kikaba ari ikindi kintu kibabaza umukobwa ku rwego rwo hejuru.

Uko utagomba kugereranya umukobwa w’inshuti yawe na bo mu muryango wawe, niko nawe utakwigereranya na se cyangwa na basaza be kuko hari ubwo aba akwifuza nk’umuntu ubarenze bose.

Kwirinda gukoresha aya magambo bishobora kuba urufunguzo rw’ibyishimo ku mubano hagati y’abakundana gusa hari n’abo bidashobora kugira icyo bihindura ku mibanire yabo bitewe na sosiyete babarizwamo n’uburyo batwaramo ibintu byabo.

Salongo Richard